Why did I not perish at birth?
I wrote this for my kids back in 2016.
Not everyone can relate to Job’s severe condition, one that compelled him to exclaim, “Why did I not perish at birth, and die as I came from the womb?” (Job 3:10) But, I can relate. Three times in my life, I’ve reached the emotional and spiritual state where I, too, cried out to God, “Why was I ever born! Why did I survive my birth, or why was I ever conceived?” I said as Job did, “What I feared has come upon me, what I dreaded has happened to me.” (Job 3:25)
Perhaps you cannot relate to these emotions, these innermost thoughts. However, I write this for I am sure there are some, maybe even within my family, that have fought this battle, wrested with this enemy and cried our “What I feared has come up me!”
Don’t hide or bury this battle for you will steal away hope for others amid a similar war upon their soul. I am not promoting a constant retelling of your struggle. But, as God places this in your conversation, and your spirit confirms God’s prompting, don’t hide, don’t withhold, don’t steal their hope that Christ put in you for such a time as this.
Whether that person is a friend, family, or stranger, God’s timing is perfect; don’t let it pass you by. Ask and let them pour out their hearts, that disease that is within them. Listen and do not interrupt though you have wisdom, make room for the light of the Holy Spirit to shine within their souls to begin a complete healing. Healing that our words, though thought as valuable to us, may not bring healing to them.
As healing takes place, and it rarely is spontaneous, a person you hardly recognize will emerge. Fear is a cancer of the soul. Loss of trust in Christ is a surrender to God’s enemy. Job said, “I have no peace, no quietness, I have no rest, but only turmoil.” (Job 3:26) That is how this condition usurps the place of peace, hope, and faith. It carries with it the temptation to abandon God and bow to the enemy.
“Curse God and die” (Job 2;9) is the voice of Satan that came from Job’s wife, and those words will come to you from many that council you who are not strong in the Lord. But in God, there is always hope, and He gives liberally to His saints. Relief, renewal, and reward await those who stand the test. That yield not nor bow their knee to our enemy, but stand firm though, in our natural sight, all seems lost, and even God’s people ridicule you, abandon you, or worse.
There is good news, for Jesus, through the Holy Spirit and written by Paul, said: “Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus…” Through Jesus, we are set free. And, by our Lord and Savior, we have hope, help and holy renewal. Perhaps, we may physically die, but more likely, as did Job, we will be shown the root of our condition and be delivered back to life.
May God bless and keep you all.